Edinburgh is a divided city.
Cutting right through the heart of the city is a battle that allows for no neutrality.
You are either on one side or the other.
No opting out.
Are you Filmhouse or are you Cameo?
It's that simple.
It's not really a choice either.
You just are one or the other.
It's something that comes from within you.
For my part I have fallen firmly in the Filmhouse camp.
All that is good, true and beautiful about cinema and cinema going is found on this side of the battle...the other side, the Cameo side, is dark, unpleasant and filled with an evil that is difficult to imagine.
A cameo is a brief appearance...normally the sort of smug, self-aggrandising appearance that reeks of faded fame. Sure it can also be entertaining and bring a smile to your face but it is, by its definition, fleeting.
That's the Cameo.
A name that evokes all the beauty of cinema.
A house is a refuge from the horrors of the outside world. Your house is a place to return to. It offers shelter. It is filled with your memories. It's always there for you. Familiar faces. In good or bad times.
A house of film.
Film should offer exactly what a house offers...refuge, shelter in good or bad times.
The whole experience of a trip to the Filmhouse places it head and shoulders above the other place.
Toilets that don't involve navigating a descent to rival that described by Dante in "Inferno".
A bar that is peaceful and that serves good food.
Magazines and DVDs to browse while you wait for the film to start.
Staff who seem happy to be at work...I'm sure that's not always the case but they are genuinely welcoming and pleasant.
A selection of films that shocks, entertains, intrigues and thrills.
All of this missing on the dark side.
So, what side are you on?
It's not too late for you if you have found yourself through geography or peer pressure on the wrong side...cross the divide and we will welcome you with open arms.
The time is now.